Shyness and Childhood Depression and Anxiety Part 2

This post will be a continuation of my post on shyness and depression and anxiety.  Some of my information has been taken from the American Psychological Association (2009).  The rest of my information comes from my education and my own experiences. 

 

I said it before, shyness is not a mental illness but it may be a symptom of an underlying anxiety issue, an underlying fearfulness or depression. 

 

 I’m asking everyone to please notice shy, quiet children.  Notice children who have trouble making friends, children who sit alone, children who cry easily, who are overly sensitive.  Ask them if they are OK.  They may say they are fine but keep an eye on them.  Don’t let these children suffer in silence. 

 

Everyone focuses so much on children with behavioral problems they overlook the pain of the shy children who are considered good.  Good children can hurt too.  Sometimes they hurt the most.  Many people say that shyness is just part of the child’s personality but they don’t ask why is it part of their personality. 

 

Personality is an interaction between biology and environment.  Yes, some children are born a little more emotionally reactive, a little more anxious or fearful and yes some environments can contribute to shyness but shy children can overcome their shyness with a little help.  

Therapists can help children learn coping skills and teach them and their parents how to improve confidence and social skills.  Just remember, therapy is good.  It’s not bad and it can help a child a great deal. 

 

If you have or know a shy child take notice.  Ask them some questions about what they think and how they feel.  Notice their social interactions; ask teachers about their social interactions during class, recess, lunch and gym.  If you have concerns take your child to a therapist or other professional.  Tell them your concerns and let them assess your child.  I’ll say it again.  Don’t let a child suffer in silence.  Help them find the goodness inside themselves and hope for the future.

 

I know from experience how much pain a shy child can have.  It’s agony.  The pain doesn’t necessarily come from being shy but shy children tend to have a harder time dealing with the traumas and experiences that often contribute to depression.  Shy children tend to be more emotional, tend to feel emotions more deeply and may have a harder time dealing with those emotions. 

 

I’m going to vent a little bit here.  People are so worried about not wanting to label a child as mentally ill that they overlook children or even ignore children who need help or children who could benefit from therapy. 

 

Just because a child is shy and has some anxiety issues or depression and is getting help from a therapist doesn’t mean the child is crazy but there are people in our society who will label them that way and stigmatize anyone who sees a therapist or psychiatrist.  That, unfortunately, is the reality of our world and the ignorance of many people.  Stop looking at the labels our culture, our society puts on people and just think about helping the children who need it.  Labels don’t matter to a child who is suffering.  They just want to stop feeling pain.    

 

Do you think shyness should be labeled as a disorder?   I welcome any comments.  I just ask that you be respectful to everyone.  My next few posts will be about what a child suffering from depression can think and feel.  Thank you so much.