This post is about the symptoms of childhood depression.
If you are concerned that your child is suffering from
depression please take the child to a therapist, counselor or other mental
health professional for assessment. Some
of the symptoms of childhood depression are normal to have every once in
a while but if the child has 3 or more of these symptoms that
last most of the day, nearly every day for more than
2 weeks then it could be a concern. Now
I will get started with the symptoms.
Often times children who suffer from depression can have a lot of
physical problems. Emotional
distress, pain and anxiety can cause headaches, nausea, stomach pain,
muscles aches and even
vomiting. A child’s stomach
can feel like it’s in knots; turning and churning, always tight, always
tense. The tension in a depressed child’s body can cause a lot of the physical
issues they may have.
On a personal note, I had a lot of physical complaints and
illnesses like headaches and stomachaches but I also had earaches, jaw pain and back pain.
The headaches, earaches and jaw pain were caused by
the stress and strain depression puts on a child’s mind and body. My jaw muscles were so tense all the time, I
would grit and grind my teeth. This caused pain in my head, neck and
face. My back pain was caused by
the tension in my body as well but I also used it as an excuse so I wouldn’t have to go to school.
I loved learning and still do but I sometimes wanted to stay
home because of my anxiety or
because I didn’t want people at school to see
me cry. Depressed children can have
a hard time controlling their tears.
At times I tried to hide my crying by rubbing my eyes really
hard and saying my allergies were
bothering me. I needed a reason for red,
watery, puffy eyes. It was a helpful
excuse.
Another sign to look for is sadness or irritability. A depressed child may not seem happy or smile
very often. If they do smile it can be
because they want to hide how they
really feel. A depressed child may cry a lot or cry very easily. They may be overly sensitive to
criticism, rejection, failure or even something as simple as someone raising
their voice can make the child cry.
Depression in quiet, shy children may be harder to recognize
because they seem to have a tendency to turn their pain inward at
themselves, blaming themselves. They’re the ones who may be more likely to hide
their pain.
A depressed child may seem very moody. One minute they can be fine, the next minute
they are crying and throwing a tantrum. Depression
in some children can come out as irritability, anger and as acting out. They may yell,
argue or fight with a parent or other child.
They may scream and throw things or do things they know they aren’t supposed to do.
Depressed children may
be very fussy and whine more than other children. The caregiver may have a very hard time
trying to sooth a depressed
child. She may try talking to the child,
holding him, hugging her or maybe even yelling but nothing seems to help. Taking care of a depressed child can be more frustrating. If you notice you are more frustrated by a
child than by other children, that could be a concern. Just remember the child is not being difficult on purpose or
to bother you, they are suffering and don’t know what’s wrong
or how to express their pain. They need a little patience, a good therapist
and a lot of love
Many depressed children may appear to not enjoy
life or not enjoy the things they used to be interested in. They may not
have many friends. If they do, they may
spend less time with those friends or may stop playing with
friends all together. They may not enjoy
sports they once liked or they may stop playing sports. A depressed child may have little or no
interest in playing with their toys,
drawing or coloring. They may play
outside less or not at all. They may
stop reading books they like or stop playing video games. If you notice your child doesn’t seem to
have any fun or enjoy anything, you may want to get the child assessed or
at least look to see if he has any other symptoms.
Some symptoms are more visible than others. A depressed child may experience weight
loss or weight gain. You may notice the child is eating less or
maybe less often. The child may not be gaining the weight that
is expected as she grows. I said in my
previous post that depression can cause nausea
and stomach problems. Because of this
some depressed children may not want to eat. For some children the
opposite may be true.
You may notice the child is eating more food than usual
and more often. Some children may become
emotional eaters. I have seen some
parents tell their children that eating
will make them feel better.
It’s not a good idea to say that to children. That can contribute to a child becoming
someone who tries to stuff down all their pain with food instead of talking
about what is making them feel bad. Also
when a child is under stress their bodies may crave carbohydrates like pasta and bread.
I know it may seem odd
that weight loss or weight gain can be symptoms. Usually people say, is it one or the
other. Children are different
and depression can affect them in many different ways.
The symptoms of depression
can vary from child to child. One child might lose weight but a different
child may gain weight. Just notice if a
child’s weight has changed or if they don’t seem to be
thriving, which means gaining the weight they are supposed to.
A depressed child may sleep too much or not enough. Again depression affects children differently
and symptoms can vary from child to child.
One child may sleep more and a different child my sleep less.
The child may sleep longer or more often. He may go to bed earlier and sleep later or may nap more often.
A child who rarely took naps before may take several naps a day. One problem you may have is you think your child is sleeping but he may just be in bed crying and thinking terrible thoughts, pretending he is asleep.
Some depressed children may have trouble sleeping. She may have a hard time falling asleep. If she does fall asleep, she may wake up
in the middle of the night and have trouble falling back to sleep or the
child may wake up too early and have trouble falling back to sleep.
A child may have trouble sleeping because all the negative thoughts they have are constantly running through their mind keeping them up. Some depressed children can’t calm their
brains down enough to fall asleep or some children may not want to sleep
because of bad dreams or nightmares.
Some depressed children may be more agitated than usual. A child may have trouble sitting still. The child may pace the floor. They may
fiddle with their clothes or other objects.
The child may seem on edge all the time and may startle more easily. If your child has never had ADHD but you
notice these agitated behaviors, it
might be a concern.
It may take a depressed child longer to think. It may take the child longer to answer a
question. Their brain may need extra
time because they can have trouble focusing, concentrating or understanding and may need more time to
figure out what you want. They may be so
overwhelmed by their inner negative thoughts that
it’s hard for them to pay attention to anything else. Also, their speech may
be slower. They may speak with a softer
voice or they may not speak at all.
A depressed child may
say he’s always tired or he may seem very tired most of the time. The child may want to just sit around or
lie around and do nothing. When a
child does do something they may complain it’s too tiring. It may take more effort for a child to
do things. It may take longer for
a child to do things, maybe even twice as long. I know from experience sometimes it’s hard
to just move. Depression, especially
childhood depression, is exhausting.
Childhood depression is very difficult to go through. It truly is living in Hell. A depressed child may think they are not
good enough or that they are bad even if they never get into
trouble. They may say they are stupid
or nobody likes them. They may think
everything is their fault.
Everything they think about themselves is very negative.
Depressed children may constantly think about past failure or rejection. They may constantly think about future failure or rejection. They may think that they’ll never be good at
anything, like there is no hope for them. Hopelessness
is the worst thing about childhood depression.
Children are supposed to feel like they can accomplish anything but
depressed children may not be able to see any goodness or light in their
future.
A depressed child may also have trouble remembering
things. They may have trouble
learning something new. As I said in
before, their brain may have trouble
focusing, concentrating and understanding. They may be easily distracted. Their grades
may drop. They may have trouble at school. They may have behavior problems or
they may not participate in class or during out of class activities. They may have trouble or be afraid of making
decisions or answering questions
because of low self-esteem and lack of self-confidence.
I’d like to add a note here.
If your child does well in school and makes good grades it
doesn’t mean she’s not depressed. I did
really well in school, I made good grades, I never got into any kind of trouble
but I suffered from depression my entire childhood.
This will be the last symptom of childhood depression that I
will talk about. It is also the worst
symptom. A child who is depressed may think
a lot about death or suicide. They may
try to kill themselves. A depressed
child may talk a lot about death or ask a lot of questions about death like, “Does it hurt?” The child may ask a lot of questions about heaven, God and Jesus.
They may seem preoccupied with dying.
No one wants to think
a child is in so much pain that they will kill themselves but I know from my
own experiences some depressed children see death as a way out of their
unbearable pain, maybe the only way out.
I tried to kill myself when I was 8 then again when I was 9 but nobody
ever knew. I hid it because I didn’t
want to be stopped
I hope this explanation
of symptoms of childhood depression is helpful.
Thanks so much